Let’s face it, business travel and motherhood often don’t mix but if you are committed to your career, it is an essential part of the job. I love and loathe business travel. I love it because it’s one of the only times I can get seven uninterrupted hours of sleep; I don’t have to worry about grubby fingers shoved  up my nose or a little face pressed up against mine at the crack of dawn demanding, “Mama, no more sleeping! You wake up NOW!”

On business trips I get the whole bed to myself and don’t have to worry about stepping on a toy and losing a toe on  the way to the bathroom. I can sit down and eat an entire meal without getting up to clean up a box of Cheerios that mysteriously dumped itself on the kitchen floor.

When I travel I love meeting with clients and colleagues, seeing new places, and doing the occasional sightseeing trip when I can squeeze it in. Yes, there are lots of reasons to love business travel.

I loathe business travel mostly because I miss my little boy terribly. I can’t count the number of times I’ve awakened hanging off the edge of my hotel bed because I’ve grown so accustomed to having a little sleeping body wedged next to mine. I miss that warmth. I miss the bedtime rituals and early morning chats over oatmeal.

At D2′s age (he’s almost three), being gone more than a few days means I’ve missed something new he’s learned to say or do.

After D2 was born, I didn’t start traveling again until he turned one. When I did start traveling again I’d whip myself into a frenzy until the moment I stepped on the plane. In addition to making sure all of the household chores were done, I would spend the weekend before my trip grocery shopping, running errands and cooking extra meals for D2, his nanny Eva and Dr.D.

I taped an emergency contact sheet on the fridge door and checked Dr. D.’s mobile phone contacts to make sure poison control, our pediatrician and advice nurse’s numbers were pre-programmed.

Before every trip I emailed Dr. D. a long list of dos and don’ts.  Here’s a sample:

D2 goes to bed at 8pm. Not 8:30 or 8:45, 8pm. Make sure to tuck Elmo, his dump truck and his train Old Puffer Pete into bed with him.
Don’t give D2 milk after 7:30pm otherwise he’ll soak his pull-up in the middle of the night and wake up.
D2 likes yogurt, veggie straws and an apple in his pre-school snack (but don’t cut the apple up or he won’t eat it).
D2 needs to eat at least two vegetables and two fruits every day to stay regular.
D2 needs to poop every day (ask his teacher too). If he misses a day, give him an extra apple. That’ll do the trick.

And so on.

I wish I could say I was kidding about the list but I’m not. Not only did I have The List, I called home every night to check on D2. How did his day go? What did he eat? Does he miss me? Dr. D. answered all of my questions patiently. He’s fine. Yes, he pooped. No, he didn’t sleep too long at nap time. We gotta go, we’re eating fried chicken, barbecue chips and ice cream for dinner. Ha, ha. Just kidding!

Apparently, I am not the only mom who went into overdrive before traveling for business. Earlier this spring I came across this New York Times article on working mothers and travel. The moms featured were instantly familiar to me because I saw myself in them. It was humbling and a bit embarrassing.

While I could feel smug that at least I wasn’t pre-packaging a week’s worth of D2′s outfits in ziplock bags, the article made me think hard about my behavior and the message I was sending my husband. Was I was unconsciously telling him that I didn’t trust him to take care of our son? Was I intimating that I didn’t think he could make good decisions while I was gone?

I think so.

So I made a change. It’s taken me three years to grudgingly accept that while Dr. D.and I have very different parenting styles, I know he will move Heaven and Earth to make sure D2 is safe and happy. Would I like it if he made sure D2 ate all of his fruit before tucking into yet another bag of goldfish? Yes.  

Would I be happier if he didn’t mix D2′s Boden plaid pants with his striped t-shirts? Sure. But you know what? Seeing how happy and content D2 is when I return home is all I need.

These days I’m much more relaxed before I travel for business. I still grocery shop and make sure the refrigerator is well stocked (that’s just the mommy in me) but gone is the honey-do list and multiple check in calls. All of the time I used to spend on pre-travel prep insanity is now spent hanging out with D2, showing him where I’m going on the map and talking about what we’ll do together when I return. I’m calmer and Dr. D. is relieved that I’m no longer checking up on him.

An added benefit to my being gone is Dr. D. and D2 get to deepen their own father-son bond. What’s not to love?

Your turn. How do you prepare your family for your business trips? Do you ever find yourself going overboard? Let me know what  you think in the comments.

  

 

Admit it. When you think of canning what comes to mind? That suspicious looking jar of chow chow your Aunt Edna gave you three years ago that you haven’t had the courage to open?   

I confess I was one of those people who thought canning was so, well, old school. You would think as someone who loves to cook I would have discovered the joys of this art sooner but it wasn’t until last year that a chance program on the Cooking Channel ignited my interest in canning. 

I’ve been obsessed ever since and now twice a year, I get together with D2′s godmother and a few friends to can summer and fall fruit. This year we made peach, peach bourbon and strawberry-lemon marmelade jam along with maple Vidalia onion conserve. To say they are delicious is an understatement. There is nothing like getting the best fruit(or veggies) from your local farmer’s market and turning it into lovely jam you made yourself.  

In this day and age of processed food and expendable knick knacks,  a jar of homemade jam makes a perfect gift.   

While canning can certainly be done solo, it’s so much more fun with a group of friends. This past June we canned over 50 jars. It’s now apple and pear season so we are now gearing up for our fall session. The cookbook I use is the Better Homes and Garden cookbook on canning. It has dozens of recipes along with everything you need to know about safely canning fruits and vegetables. 

This peach bourbon jam recipe has been such  big hit with my friends and family I can’t keep it on my pantry shelf.  If you are not a fan of bourbon, simply leave it out. Try this recipe out for yourself and let me know what you think.

Prep: 30 minutes  Process: 5 minutes 

7 cups of sugar
4 cups of finally chopped, peeled ripe peaches (about three pounds fresh)
1/4 cup of lemon juice
1/2 cup of bourbon
1/2 of a 6-oz package (1 foil pouch) liquid fruit pectin 

Step 1
In a 6-8 quart heavy pot, combine sugar, peaches, lemon juice and bourbon. Bring to boil, stirring constantly until sugar dissolves. Quickly stir in pectin. Bring to a full rolling boil, stirring constantly. Boil hard for 1 minute, stirring constantly. Remove from heat. Quickly skim off foam with a metal spoon. 

Step 2
Ladle hot jam into, sterilized jars half-pint canning jars leaving 1/4 inch of headspace. Wipe jar rims; adjust lids.  

 

 Cook’s Notes: 1) Like baking, canning is a very precise process. It’s critical to follow the directions exactly as written and not deviate to ensure you are preserving your fruit safely and preventing harmful bacteria from forming. 2) Can only what’s in season and buy from your local farmer’s market where fruit and veggies are far more superior to conventionally grown grocery store produce. 3) Be patient! Your jam should rest for at least three weeks before eating but waiting two months or more is even better. It gives the flavors more time to meld. 4) Enjoy on pancakes, steel cut oats, Greek yogurt or fresh bread. 

Give canning a go and I promise you’ll never buy a jar of store bought jam again. It’s that good. Enjoy!