One of my favorite scenes in the movie Sex and the City 2 is when Charlotte and Miranda, holed up in their posh Abu Dhabi hotel, commiserate over cocktails about the struggles of being a working mother.  Charlotte confesses the first thing she thought of when she had fears her husband Harry was cheating on her with the nanny was, “I can’t lose my nanny!”

I along with many other working moms cracked up at this because we know a great nanny is worth her weight in gold.  My girlfriends and I joke if we ever had to choose between our husbands and our nannies, we were going with the nanny no question.

A great nanny will pick up the slack when your tot needs to unexpectedly go to the pediatrician and you can’t get away from work. She will do arts and crafts galore, even if you don’t have a crafty bone in your body. She will make sure your child is clothed, fed and tucked into bed while you are making that big presentation in London.

If you have a great nanny, you know you can’t live without her.

She becomes a natural extension of your family. Actress Julie Bowen may have raised eyebrows at the Emmy Awards when she thanked the “sister wives” who cared for her child but I know exactly what she was talking about.

Nannies are the unsung sheroes of many American families.

So why are so many treated like shit?

The reality is that many women who become nannies and domestic workers come from developing countries. They often come to the US as undocumented workers looking to better their families’ lives. Go to any park mid-day in Chicago or New York and you’ll see women from the Dominican Republic, Jamaica, Mexico or the Philippines watching after their young charges. Often, they are black and brown women speaking Patois, Spanish, Creole and Tagalog.

Yes, you read the rare story about the nannies who makes $150,000 a year and help parents prepare their children to get into the best prep schools and make the “right” friends, but they are exceptions.

The vast majority of nannies and other domestic workers barely make minimum wage.

These women are the most vulnerable to exploitation.

Earlier this week the National Domestic Workers Alliance released the not so shocking results of a recent study. Domestic workers they interviewed reported long hours, low pay and wage theft among a long list of grievances; demonstrating we have a long way to go in protecting the rights of women who work in our homes.

As a mom you entrust your nanny with what’s most precious in your life – your child.

So I get pissed off when I hear about  reports like this and how some families treat their nannies. D2′s nanny Eva has been with us for three years now and while we have a very close relationship, I never forget that she is my employee first and she deserves to make a good living with good working conditions.

Eva has shared with me horror stories of friends who work for families where the caregivers are expected to look after multiple children, cook, run errands, clean house and be available on call seven days a week with no vacation or breaks.

Her own former employer was a family with eight children. Since her departure, they’ve gone through nannies like dirty diapers because the workload was too heavy for a single caregiver.

As women we should stand up for the women who do the work we can’t or won’t do.

Currently, most labor laws offer domestic workers very little protection so up it’s up to you as the employer to do the right thing. I believe any family who is truly dedicated to their nanny’s well being will absolutely have the following in place to protect her and you:

• A contract that establishes her salary, hours of duty, and specific duties to be performed
• A clearly articulated policy (or established norms) around overtime requirements and pay
• Regularly scheduled breaks during the day and vacations
• Predictable pay periods with regularly filed payroll taxes

If you are confused about what’s fair to ask your nanny to do,  here is a short-list of activities I think are within boundaries:

• Watch your child during your work hours and designated non-work hours
• Pick your child up from school and transport to activities as needed
• Cook for your child
• Clean up common areas where your child plays
• Do your child’s laundry
• Arrange for play dates, do art projects and crafts
• Help with or supervise completion of homework

You should  negotiate all of your  nanny’s duties upfront and if you need to expand her responsibilities or ask her to work overtime, you should expect to pay her more.

It’s true that money is tight for many families now and the cost of childcare is insane. Truth be told, the US is woefully behind other industrialized nations when it comes to affordable childcare.

But it’s time to put mothers on blast who are taking advantage of their nannies and other care givers.

If you can’t afford to pay your nanny  a living wage and provide her with good working conditions, you can’t afford a nanny.  In 2010 New York became the first state to pass a domestic workers bill of rights which guaranteed among other benefits, overtime pay.

Unfortunately, the governor of California recently vetoed a similar bill.

Many of us have mothers and aunties who worked as domestics. Dr. D.’s late mother, one of the most honorable and amazing women I had the privilege to have in my life, worked her entire life as a domestic. My late maternal grandmother worked as a domestic for much of her young life.

I’m willing to risk sounding like a preachy sanctimommy to stand up for women like them who worked so hard to allow women like me to do what I do.

I know not just a few short decades ago, being a domestic might have been the only work available to a black girl like me. I owe them.

Your turn. What do are your thoughts about domestic workers and the possibility of taking advantage of them? Am I being too harsh? Not seeing the bigger picture? Let me know your thoughts in the comments.

 

Have you ever been a member of a lousy team? Maybe the team leader didn’t provide good direction. Perhaps one person slacked off on crucial deadlines. Or maybe someone just didn’t pull her weight. I been fortunate to mostly have had great team experiences. Still the bad ones stick in my mind.

I remember so clearly my worst team experience.

Three years ago I was working on my executive MBA. As part of a week-long public policy class in DC I was teamed up with four other MBA students from two other business schools to complete a project due at the end of the week. Even though we had never worked together before and barely knew each other, we would be graded as a team. Of my four team mates, three checked out of the project almost from the beginning forcing my remaining teammate and I to complete the task on our own.

We labored over our project for three long, late nights each hoping the other wouldn’t bail out at the last minute. And while we earned a good grade on the project, the whole experience left a bad taste in my mouth and gave me a definite point of view about what made a good team.

Show me a successful project and I’ll show you a really great team.

While there are lots  of academic studies about what makes a high-performing team, I’ve got my own theories about the kind of people every team needs in order to be successful.

It got me thinking.

If I had to choose five key people to be on my team, who would they be?

The Mad Scientist. Every team needs an idea person, someone with a creative, counter-intutive mindset who can come up with an idea that can be blindingly obvious and yet totally novel at the same time. They are natural innovators. The Mad Scientist will challenge group think when the team falls into a rut or is playing it too safe. His ideas are often ahead of their time and may get dismissed for being too impractical or too difficult to pull off because of organizational politics.

But you need this kind of thinker so protect him, make sure he doesn’t get discouraged by naysayers and allow him to challenge you to keep your team’s thinking fresh.

The Data Cruncher. Every team needs a member with superior analytical abilities. It’s not just about someone who can pull together a spreadsheet (that’s essential too) but a good Data Cruncher is able to weave together seemingly disparate streams of information and create meaning from them in a variety of formats that are easy for laypeople to understand.  Whether you are pitching a new idea to your boss, preparing for a presentation to your Board or just doing foundational research for an idea you are exploring, you need him.

Data Crunchers are naturally curious people who ask good questions that often others on your team haven’t considered. The best  have a high degree of organizational credibility so don’t be afraid to ask him or her to be a co-presenter when it’s time to make your pitch your Big Idea.

The Empathic. Hard-charging, ambitious teams need this role in particular. The Empathic will make sure you don’t run roughshod over your colleagues. Their talent is being the team’s conscience. They will remind you that the”minor system upgrade” that’s no big deal to you will create a mutiny if you don’t get buy-in first. These people tend to have well-developed F traits on the Myers Briggs Type Indicator.

Empathics are tactful, worry about group harmony and generally are sensitive to the needs of others. If this is a blind spot for you, this role becomes even more crucial. The Empathetic is particularly useful if you are introducing new ideas that will require culture change as she will make sure you don’t inadvertently step on cultural or political land mines.

The Utility Player. Put a Utility Player into any role on the team and he’ll deliver. They are as comfortable being followers as they are being leaders. People in this role often fly under the radar because they are so unassuming. They may not be dynamic or magnetic personalities but give them any job and they’ll get it done without a lot of fan fare or ego. Smart and focused, Utility Players are heavy lifters and can outwork most of their colleagues.  Key to this role is they are not just doers but thinkers and make great thought partners and are good for gut-checking ideas.

The Field Marshall.  The Field Marshall can create order out of chaos. She is able to keep the big picture in mind while minding the details.  You can spot the Field Marshall by her detailed lists, charts and timelines. She is pragmatic, action-oriented and highly networked within her organization. She can call on the right resources in a pinch to get things done. You never have to look over her shoulder or micro-manage her because she is highly-motivated and self-directed.

Field Marshalls have a sense of urgency so when there is a deadline to be met, you can be sure she’s going to work like hell (and make sure everyone else does too) to get the job done.

Of course there are many important roles on any team but from my experience, these five are essential for success.

Now your turn. When you need to pull a team together what kind of people do you typically call on? What’s been your best or worst team experience? Let me know your thoughts in the comments.