Recently, I sat down with Alisha Walker, one of half of the dynamic duo known as the Marriage Coaches.  Alisha, a Licensed Professional Counselor, and her husband Ben, a minister, are on a mission to help couples create strong, healthy life-time commitments to marriage. I had the privilege of meeting Alisha last fall at Blogalicious Weekend in Washington, DC. When she told me about her and her husband’s practice and their mission to strengthen marriages, I knew I wanted to introduce her to my readers.

Tell me a little about The Marriage Coaches.
We work primarily with people who are married or engaged to help enrich and save their marriages. We also work with singles before they get engaged. Our belief is if you know more about how to make marriage work, you can prevent some of the issues that married people struggle with.

Want want people to learn what marriage is supposed to really be about. In premarital counseling we talk about the fairy tale versus the reality. Too many people are caught up in the fairy tale of marriage but what we strive to do is show you what marriage really looks like. It’s not about the fairy tale!

In addition to your counseling practice, you and your husband are very active in social media.
Yes, we have the website, we have a radio program and of course we are on Facebook and Twitter.  We want to talk about the positive side of marriage. There is too much bad press out there about marriage. We want to be able to offer tools for people to use at home, church, or their men’s or women’s group- where ever.  

What prompted you to focus your practice on marriage counseling?  
I have been counseling individuals for 17 years but it’s been in the last five years that Ben and I have worked together. It’s been a good partnership especially when it comes to working with husbands. We found that men respond to other men. We talk about how men can be good husbands. So many people in our community, especially men, come from single parent homes where the mother is the dominate figure. They’ve had no role models. So we bring men to the table with other men to help strengthen families and show them what it is to lead their families.

You see many different types of challenges in your practice. What do you think are the main issues that couples struggle with today?
 If you boil it down, it comes down to a handful of things:  out of proportion expectations, lack of forgiveness and the unwillingness to work hard. Couples have to be able to forgive both big and small things. People believe in fairy tales rather than the real work of marriage. We find that in popular culture there aren’t many realistic images of marriage. A lot of problems come from couples having expectations of one another but they haven’t articulated those expectations to each other.  Couples need to share their expectations. They also have to understand why they have those expectations and then be able to voice them in a respectful way.  You have to talk about even the smallest of details. 

You and your husband have a book coming out later this spring, tell me about it.
Yes, we are working on a book called “I Love Being Married: A Guide to Divorce-Proof Your Marriage.”  In the book we talk about ways to handle common challenges that come with marriage: conflict management, the best way to love your spouse, and how to make sure you are getting your needs fulfilled. It’s really key in all relationships to look at how a person needs to be loved. Ultimately, we are trying to get couples to stay together – to make the commitment.The book will have a work book and tools for couples to use together or in a small group setting. We are especially hoping to engage men in this process.

For busy couples who are balancing work and family, what do think are the keys to keeping a marriage strong? Communication, spending time together, and keeping your friendship – that is so key. Couples focus so much on the job and children that sometimes they forget what it was that drew them together. Have you talked to your spouse lately about what’s bothering him or her at work? What is something new that you may not know?  Educate yourself about your spouse. If your spouse is your best friend, it will be hard for someone or something else to get in between you.  

You are a working mother with five children, how do you balance a busy counseling practice with motherhood?  You know that big cup of coffee on your masthead? That’s how I do it! Coffee!  Honestly, I have a really helpful, supportive husband. We work together as a team. We have a lot of support from friends and family. I have to make sure I take care of myself. Prayer, seeking quiet time and good friends and family all help. You can’t do it alone. It’s really important to have a support system.   Prepare, plan and communicate in advance and then have a good support system.

To learn more about Alisha and Ben Walker’s counseling practice, their upcoming book and get a wealth of tools to help your marriage, visit them at  www.themarriagecoaches.net

This past October I attended Blogalicious Weekend 2011 in Washington, DC. While there I met Caroline Barrett,  a program officer with Shot At Life, a new global initiative of the United Nations Foundation. Shot At Life  is a  movement to protect children worldwide by providing life-saving vaccines where they are most needed. As a mother and a global citizen, causes supporting global maternal and child health are near and dear to my heart. I know how important vaccines are as a foundation to a healthy childhood; my toddler son has just finished his crucial two-year sequence of vaccines. 

I recently sat down with Peg Willingham, Executive Director for Shot At Life, to get her take on why this is such an important intiative and what moms can do to get involved:

How did Shot At Life come about?
The United Nations Foundation has had a long history of running successful global health campaigns. So much so that the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation approached us to launch a grassroots advocacy initiative to support vaccination of children where they are most needed. We worked with a number of global partners to help develop the campaign. In our research, we  realized that mothers of young children were an important audience because mothers typically make the healthcare decisions in the family. We came up with the name Shot@Life to educate people about prevention.  By and large it’s not something most of us think about, but almost two million children are dying each year from preventable diseases.

Why are vaccines such an important health prevention tool?
Right now about 80% of children are covered world wide by vaccines. In the last few years there has been a realization that this is one of the most  cost effective, medically effective interventions there is for health preservation. Especially during a time when budgets are tight, the small cost of a vaccine can make a huge differenence in a child’s life. You can protect not just a child but an entire community.

There are so many reasons vaccines are important. Really, they are a tool for social justice.   Vaccines give children a level playing field. They are helpful for brain development and learning because some childhood diseases can cause brain damage.  A vaccinated child gets a leg up educationally and when they do better in school, they will eventually contribute to their economy. What’s more if a family is displaced by disaster or war, these children are protected where ever they go.

What are the top five things someone can do to get involved?
Spread the word! Talk about Shot At Life Facebook, your blog or on Twitter. People can also host get togethers at home or host a baby shower or scrapbooking party where proceeds go to Shot At Life.  Sign the pledge on line. You can also advocate by calling or writing to your member of congress and let him or her know you support funding life-saving vaccines for children. And of course, you can donate any amount. For just a few dollars you can protect a child for life against measles and other preventable diseases.

What role do you think mothers can play in spreading the word? 
Mothers are important becauase women are online more. More women are on Facebook and Twitter than any other group.Women  tend to be the ones who make the philanthropic decisions in families. And we get things done!  Mothers can relate to mothers in emerging countries. We all want the same thing for our children. The point is, you can do something. It doesn’t have to be huge. Use your voice. You can find ways to get people engaged. Right an Op-ed, do a viral video, help us co-create this campaign. It’s about the creativity and passion of mothers (and all who want to contribute). We hope to ignite a movement that makes people want  to help.

How are donations to Shot@Life used?  
All donations are used for vaccine programs.  We work with UNICEF and the World Health Organization to administer vaccines and, just as important, support vaccine  education, training materials and social mobilization.

Peg speaks so eloquently about mission of this initiative that by the end of our chat, I just knew I had to get personally involved. With all of the controversy surrounding vaccines in the US and other western countries, it’s easy to forget that not so far back in our recent history, people regularly died from influenza, measles and polio. It’s unthinkable that children elsewhere are dying from these diseases which are so easily preventable with inexpensive vaccines.

I’m excited to share that I’ll be volunteering for Shot At Life and participating in their national launch in April, 2012.  I’ll keep you updated with news about this movement and how you can help make sure that every child has an opportunity to lead a healthy and productive life, right from the start. I hope you’ll join me!