This month as record temperatures blaze through my homestate of North Carolina, all I’m thinking about is a cool refreshing pool. Like most parents, I look forward to trips to our local pool and to the lovely beaches of South Carolina where we’ll vacation this year.  Dr. D. and I come naturally by our love of the water he as a native Floridian and me as a born and raised California girl. We were both toddlers when our parents introduced us to the joys of water.

So we knew early on that we wanted  D2 to learn to swim early, as we did as children. But I struggled over what kind of swimming lessons to enroll D2 into. 

First and foremost, I wanted D2 to learn to not be afraid of being in the water and to be able to save himself if he ever fell into a pool, lake or pond. 

ISR’s mission is focused on ensuring not one more child drowns. 

At work I happened to be chatting with my colleague Shirley who also has a toddler son. She raved about Infant Swim Self Rescue (ISR).

Highly-trained licensed instructors guide children as young as six months up to six years of age through a series of lessons designed to teach them how to save themselves if they ever fall into water.

Shirley gave me a ISR  brochure and after scanning their website I was sold.

Our wonderful instructor Molly Day  was everything I hoped she would be,  kind and patient and exclusively focused on my child. Unlike other swimming lessons, ISR lessons are one-on-one.

Each lesson lasts 10 minutes in duration and is  five days a week for an average of six weeks or until the child can competently complete the roll, float, swim sequence. Every child learns to hold his breath, swim with eyes open and look for the edge of the pool.  Your tyke also learns to float and relax on his back to catch his breath until he is ready to start the sequence again.

For a really cool example of what the swimming sequence for infants and toddlers looks like click over here to see incredible videos.  It’s nothing short of amazing.

The first few lessons can be bit hair raising as your tyke may cry from fear of the water, fear of a new teacher and just the newness of the pool. D2 cried quite a bit the first week or so but once he learned to trust Molly and gain confidence in the water, we could see how much he was enjoying himself.

One of the things I loved about Molly is she has infinite reserves of patience and is very intuitive about the individual needs of her students. This is important,  because let’s face it, not every child is anxious to put his face in the water or float on his back. It can be scary.

Although lessons are short, they are intense engaging the child’s brain as well as body. I constantly marveled at how hard D2 worked in his lessons to master the parts of the sequence that Molly had him practice over and over.

 Every effort was praised with a high-five and a “You’re Amazing!”

I  choked up when I saw D2, fully clothed in winter gear, floating confidently on his back.

 For his final two lessons, D2 had to complete the swimming sequence first in summer clothes (shirt, shorts, sandals) and then in winter clothes (polar fleece, long-sleeve shirt, jeans with sneakers and socks). As a parent you are thinking , “What in the world have I gotten my child into? How will he ever swim in soaking wet clothes?”

And then he does it!

Watching D2 complete the swim sequence in his winter gear was spectacular. I couldn’t have been a prouder mommy, watching my little guy float like a Navy Seal in the water. Indeed, he was awesome.

I am now a total Infant Swim Self Rescue convert and raving fan. 

Stop me on the street and I’ll show you the seven-minute video of D2 swimming in winter gear and calmly floating on his back. 

I count myself as one of many unofficial evangelists for this program.  I believe Infant Swim Self Rescue is as critical potty training and teaching your children not to talk to strangers.  It’s that important.

D2′s lessons are over now, but we’ll be back in the fall for maintenance lessons to keep his skills sharp. 

Tell me, have you had you any experience with ISR with your children? If you are considering lessons for your kids and want more details about our experience, drop me a line at bossmomonline@gmail.com.  I’d love to hear from you!

Wishing you a safe and happy summer swimming with your kids!

I continue to marvel at the lessons I learn as a mother. About a week ago I got the call every parent dreads. D2′s teacher called me at work one day to tell me that he had a bad, bad day.  The day started out normally enough in his toddler class at Montessori but as the day wore on he started randomly slugging his little classmates. He pushed over a little girl on the playground and shoved another classmate at the snack table for no apparent reason.

When I picked up my office line and heard D2′s teacher’s voice, my heart sank.  D2 had a very bad day today. He was just off, she tells me.  Has anything changed at home?

I’m freaking out. I rattle off a litany of potential causes of D2′s meltdown.

Allergies? Making him wear the brown sandals he hates but that look so cute with his stripey sailboat shirt? Going to bed too late? Watching “Despicable Me”  for the 35,000th time?

Excuse me while I just  go and pick up my Bad Mother of the Year award.

I call Dr. D. at the office. D2′s-teacher-just-called-and-she-said-he-was-hitting- other -kids and-she-probably thinks-we-are-child-abusers! I’m trying not to get hysterical. Dr. D. is unphased.

Of course he’s hitting other kids. They’re probably hitting him too. Not the response I’m expecting.  The thing you need to know about Dr. D. is he’s a clinical neuropsychologist with a specialty in Traumatic Brain Injury.  Very patiently he explains to me that toddlers have undeveloped frontal lobes which means they have low impulse control. 

Have you ever felt like throwing something at someone in a meeting when they say something stupid?

Umm, yes. What about it?

Well, we adults have developed frontal lobes which helps us control our impulses to do mean or destructive things to ourselves and others.  Toddlers hit people because their brains are undeveloped. It’s normal and developmentally appropriate even though it’s socially unacceptable. Just relax.

This doesn’t make me feel better.

At home I ask D2 if he hit his friends at school. He smiles at me sweetly and says yes, I hit Cora, and Beck and Anna. At least he comes clean. We talk about gentle touches and how hitting hurts people. You are a sweet boy, I tell him.

He wraps a chubby little arm around my neck and kisses my cheek.  No hitting! I do gentle touch. I make friends.  My heart melts. I hug him back. Hard.

I resolve to get D2 off to bed earlier and spend more quiet time with him in the evenings. Maybe it’s just a coincidence but it seems to work. The next week his teacher calls to tell me he is back to his lovable, sweet self. 

I remind myself that I need to stop worrying so much and enjoy all of the milestones of the Terrible Twos. I remind myself that it’s not about being a perfect parent or having the perfect child but enjoying the process of learning and discovering life together.

Your turn.  What has surprised you about your child’s development or your reactions as a parent to their less than desirable behavior?